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PollyMobiles Rebuild

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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
was talking to m8s in pub and it's been pointed out to me that I tend to talk too technical, analytical, robotic, academic, textbook like to everyone, whether its familiar friends or some stranger I just met, and to a stranger it'll seem oddly wierd.

ie I was expressing / explaining to a lass I recently met with m8s how I was into her but questioned if she was into guys and likes me? but my m8s said I wrote it like some public survey upto her face.
or that I posted in conversations my thoughts on efficient routes to pick ppl up in my car, along with detailed diagrams.

there seems to be this subtle secret generic language on how to engage with strangers with good 1st impression, talk and gather hints subtly and reserved.
to me that sounds like learning another language. my mind doesn't work subtly, quietly, or hold back or pick sarcasm / jokes.

I've been so submerged into my own private cut-off world of science, documentation, coding/programming, planning, engineering, logical computer speak that I have almost zero social skills on how to talk "normal" without being all the james may aeronautical terms.

all of these points just further highlights my wierdness and my frustrated side just wanna say "may as well stfu"

and to think that I'd be getting a new job & house elsewhere, with new workm8, new complete strangers and my technical wierdness language would just stand out.
can see my future being quite a struggle to fit in.
 
yea I need to get some form of website portfolio sorted out. the forum blog ain't ideal for the passer by. just need to pull my finger out to do it.

understand the H701 non-profit hobby project car side, like a clarkson/may/hamster weekend cocking about thing.
aye would've been concerned if it required commitment to constantly travel or move there cos it all involves alot more money, but if it's just like cad / printing stuff that I can do here, the only bottleneck is how accurately you record the information I need to produce the outcome (without me driving 3hrs there & back each time).

I do my best to contribute to ppl who ask for info/input or correct misinformation but there are times where I have to roll eyes and let it slide cos cba.

trying to comply with social/peer pressure and failing obviously doesn't make me any happier. so at this point I'm trying to ignore it and make myself happy somehow.
The blog is perfect for Kasandra, its all your work but its also what this forum is for and while I wholly expect the forum people love you being here, you do need to spread your wings a little to access more people. I have recommendations I can point you towards. It doesn't have to happen overnight, as there's tonnes of information here, but little by little it'll become something bigger


I'll happily post jigs and or prototypes or hand them over when we're in the same place like the upcoming car shows we're attending :)

Story of my life also, we can only but try to inform/educate but wasted effort at times

The breakthrough of freedom is that switch in your head that'll flick across when you realise that complying isnt necessary and only a recent thing for me. I felt harsh not helping at first but then I realise how little I stress, its not that I dont care, its just the realisation that I spend my time and resources to suit others at my own cost when I could spend less time doing that and being that bit more selfish and push towards my own goals :)

so it's like working freelance and this collab works project hub is like a central FB/linkedIn/twitter interface that links ppl up?
this is something new to me, I've never been self-employed or know how to quote clients properly for work but is something to investigate.
Nail on the head. Its for people who don't really have a name for themselves and want to get their work out there without the work of finding a client base. Its a trial concept and is looking for people with something to provide before going live later this year (September I believe)

Something I don't mind helping you with Paul if needs be. I've just learnt the hardest way of all with those bloody coilovers and while they'll probably never change now, I've learnt that information to apply to the next thing which wont make such a mockery of me and leave me seriously shortchanged.
 
OP
OP
pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
The blog is perfect for Kasandra, its all your work but its also what this forum is for and while I wholly expect the forum people love you being here, you do need to spread your wings a little to access more people. I have recommendations I can point you towards. It doesn't have to happen overnight, as there's tonnes of information here, but little by little it'll become something bigger


I'll happily post jigs and or prototypes or hand them over when we're in the same place like the upcoming car shows we're attending :)

Story of my life also, we can only but try to inform/educate but wasted effort at times

The breakthrough of freedom is that switch in your head that'll flick across when you realise that complying isnt necessary and only a recent thing for me. I felt harsh not helping at first but then I realise how little I stress, its not that I dont care, its just the realisation that I spend my time and resources to suit others at my own cost when I could spend less time doing that and being that bit more selfish and push towards my own goals :)


Nail on the head. Its for people who don't really have a name for themselves and want to get their work out there without the work of finding a client base. Its a trial concept and is looking for people with something to provide before going live later this year (September I believe)

Something I don't mind helping you with Paul if needs be. I've just learnt the hardest way of all with those bloody coilovers and while they'll probably never change now, I've learnt that information to apply to the next thing which wont make such a mockery of me and leave me seriously shortchanged.
this blog has quite literally turned into a personal diary, so it's fine as it is for my reference and for pointing ppl at certain points of my project, but hardly easy to use or professional. that's what a website is for.
with the help of andy letting me borrow his server, I'm currently trying to build a portfolio page of my best work for showing potential employers.
and soon I'd be able to finally build my very own pollymobile website with all my lifes work in sweet order.

can't help but feel I've detoured upto 10yrs of my career into 3D software that led me nowhere, when I could've been some auto engineer by now. but meh regret all I like, it's all these life experiences that defined who I am tday and do the best with what I have.

yea I've been too soft & helpful to everyone throughout my life, it's just who I am but I gotta draw the line somewhere or else I'll be destroying myself.
from BSR & making coilovers, you gathered vital knowledge, skill & exp to help progress your next performance.
 
OP
OP
pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Here's just one job you'd be good at.
http://www.baesystems.com/en/careers/careers-in-the-uk/hot-jobs/design-engineer
Now don't think you need all the qualifications that the jobs say.
the requirements and area of work is kinda out of my league. I don't have HNC/D, no idea bout their CAD (I'm more 3ds & solidworks) and uncertain about doing high end engineering calcs, especially for applied military use.

my field is more towards product/industrial design, automotive design/mech engineer, conceptual inventor, 3D games software development.
 
OP
OP
pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Paul listen to this

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b070cxyb

Should appeal to your nature, and explains how basically you need to get out there... practice makes perfect...
that's so fascinating & entertaining :) luv brian cox & science documentaries.

suppose all that hurt & rejection last year hasn't gone to waste. each encounter, attempt at suggestion followed by rejection simply meant we were an unfit match and move on to the next potentially better match. and shouldn't bother putting all my hopes up on any one person and not take it too personal.

again perhaps it's my excessive compliance to helping & caring for everyone (good or bad), which could've gone against me.
maybe I should just not care about ppl / relations / world and just live my work/hobby (like I was when younger). whether I'm successful or have someone's interest or die young single virgin, sod it, it's all a bonus.
 
OP
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Well that was a waste of time visiting some generic gp :(

I walked in, his back to me staring at pc with monotone Indian voice, I explained my issues of autism & random pressure migraine. I talked down my very long list of symptoms/traits but as he's just typing away his notes I think he lost interest so I just stopped halfway. He said a letter from some mental health assessment will come soon for a check up just in case.

Questioned if I had depression or thoughts of harm? sometimes during my darkest point. Says stress could sometimes trigger misleading symptoms n migraines etc. Um yea

Could tell he was on a timer. Tbh, no offence, but I may as well just have called an Indian tech support call centre. Humiliating. If only there's another way to get diagnosed proper.
 

Low Rider

Poindexter
Founding Member
Moderator
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Sounds pretty standard Paul. It took me almost a year to get to the bottom of what turned out to be gastric issues.

I ended up in A&E at least 4 times with extreme breathing difficulty. Each time they fobbed me off telling me I was having an anxiety attack......yeah......ok.

Decided to junk the NHS route and go and see a specialist, care of my private medical insurance. After a 5min consultation I was referred to an ENT specialist, he shoved a scope down my shnoz and had a look around and his face immediately went :eek:

I'd been refluxing stomach acid, which I'd been slowly aspirating, especially in my sleep which was causing severe airway restrictions, much like asthma. Since going on meds and implementing a few lifestyle changes, I've been fine for over a year and not one 'panic attack'.....funny that. Just as proof, if I forget meds, miss a meal or eat/drink something which is a trigger I'm immediately aware of the physiological symptoms.

In the kindest possible way, GPs are far too unspecialised to necessarily be able to spot something specific to an individual. Besides, the usual solution is to type in a list of symptoms and read off the top answer, but like a game of Family Fortunes......."our survey said?!"...
 
OP
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Sounds pretty standard Paul. It took me almost a year to get to the bottom of what turned out to be gastric issues.

I ended up in A&E at least 4 times with extreme breathing difficulty. Each time they fobbed me off telling me I was having an anxiety attack......yeah......ok.

Decided to junk the NHS route and go and see a specialist, care of my private medical insurance. After a 5min consultation I was referred to an ENT specialist, he shoved a scope down my shnoz and had a look around and his face immediately went :eek:

I'd been refluxing stomach acid, which I'd been slowly aspirating, especially in my sleep which was causing severe airway restrictions, much like asthma. Since going on meds and implementing a few lifestyle changes, I've been fine for over a year and not one 'panic attack'.....funny that. Just as proof, if I forget meds, miss a meal or eat/drink something which is a trigger I'm immediately aware of the physiological symptoms.

In the kindest possible way, GPs are far too unspecialised to necessarily be able to spot something specific to an individual. Besides, the usual solution is to type in a list of symptoms and read off the top answer, but like a game of Family Fortunes......."our survey said?!"...
blimey low rider. yeah GPs abit too vague. fine for usual physical aid, cold n flu, ache etc but for something specific or psychology it needs a specialist.
it did seem like he types the symptoms and spits out the survey or give generic answer, it's pretty much what I've been googling myself. it all adds to frustration when no one takes u seriously.

I'll see what this mental checkup things all about but from the looks of things society simply brushes it off and I just carry on alone.
 
OP
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
there's a local mental health centre in town, gonna ring em tomorrow rather than wait for the letter post
 
OP
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Sound dB
out of curiousity I brought a small £15 dB meter in maplin to measure how loud kasandra is.
mini-sound-level-meter.jpg


silent bedroom = 30dB
inside ambient noise in shopping centre with just heater fans set low = 70dB (alarm clock, talking)
inside while idling = 90dB (propellor plane cockpit)
inside while cruising 60mph = 105dB (motorcycle, air grinder)
inside while cruising 70mph'ish = 110dB (angle grinder, chainsaw, no wonder my ears are ringing after a long cruise, ain't good)

1m behind exhaust while holding 3k rpm = 95dB

dunno how accurate the meter is cos a guide says 110dB is average pain threshold and yet when my meter in -cabin says 110 it just sounds boomy but alright.
means she's ok for most trackdays but my local places like Croft with occasional 88dB limit is abit trickier
 
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Not sure how accurate that is, but if it is even vaguely accurate then it comes to no surprise that long journeys in the rally car cause me to suffer tinnitus for a good few days - it's the road noise that is unbearable with wide sticky tyres!
The exhaust is quiet in comparison to the road rumble, for me anyway
 
OP
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Not sure how accurate that is, but if it is even vaguely accurate then it comes to no surprise that long journeys in the rally car cause me to suffer tinnitus for a good few days - it's the road noise that is unbearable with wide sticky tyres!
The exhaust is quiet in comparison to the road rumble, for me anyway
yea my ears ring too, especially in quiet room. at 60 the exhaust is ok & bareable, at 70 it gets quite boomy, at 80ish i can't hear anyone or my thoughts.
road noise & wind with zero interior or sound deadening is pretty loud and had to turn stereo from level 10 (loud when stationary) upto level 25! when cruising at 70
so um yea goodbye to my hearing lol
 

MaxK11C

Micraless
Moderator
Social Brand Manager
Well that was a waste of time visiting some generic gp :(

I walked in, his back to me staring at pc with monotone Indian voice, I explained my issues of autism & random pressure migraine. I talked down my very long list of symptoms/traits but as he's just typing away his notes I think he lost interest so I just stopped halfway. He said a letter from some mental health assessment will come soon for a check up just in case.

Questioned if I had depression or thoughts of harm? sometimes during my darkest point. Says stress could sometimes trigger misleading symptoms n migraines etc. Um yea

Could tell he was on a timer. Tbh, no offence, but I may as well just have called an Indian tech support call centre. Humiliating. If only there's another way to get diagnosed proper.
Sorry to hear that.
I've been in and out of the docs recently as my mental health fell off a cliff again, but to be fair they've dealt with me really well and it's sorting me out really well.
Sounds like just a bad experience, unless I've only had good ones.

Keep smiling, I'm only a message away if you just fancy a chat to take your mind off things.
 
OP
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Sorry to hear that.
I've been in and out of the docs recently as my mental health fell off a cliff again, but to be fair they've dealt with me really well and it's sorting me out really well.
Sounds like just a bad experience, unless I've only had good ones.

Keep smiling, I'm only a message away if you just fancy a chat to take your mind off things.
Cheers Max. For the past few yrs I've only usually just ask for any generic GP at the local doc's since they relocated, but it's only now that my sista pointed out that I could actually book with Dr brash, my original Dr since childhood who was much nicer and apparently still works there. Should know for next time.
 

Love_Whiskey

Super S Restorer
You guys need to wear earplugs! You can fix and quieten cars or keep them loud, you can't do sod all about being deaf!

I've been watching this chat go on Paul with little to say from my perspective, as I haven't known you long, however I have just remembered something that helped me when I was experiencing some mental health difficulties, particularly anxiety.

http://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk

It's a bit of a clunky old website and some stuff might not be relevant, but worth a look eh?

Best wishes mate.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

Low Rider

Poindexter
Founding Member
Moderator
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I usually slap on a set of Bose QC3's although the turbo honestly isn't that loud to be honest.

It's more out of habit from driving the SuperS with ITBs which was pretty harsh and that wasn't due to the exhaust but the induction noise transmitted through the firewall.
 
OP
OP
pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
You guys need to wear earplugs! You can fix and quieten cars or keep them loud, you can't do sod all about being deaf!

I've been watching this chat go on Paul with little to say from my perspective, as I haven't known you long, however I have just remembered something that helped me when I was experiencing some mental health difficulties, particularly anxiety.

http://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk

It's a bit of a clunky old website and some stuff might not be relevant, but worth a look eh?

Best wishes mate.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
that's quite a useful site there.
ever since childhood I've always wished where was a single goto site that tells you how to live, how to do this & that exactly (short of actually plugging into the matrix & downloading knowledge n skills :p )
but since we all start off as a clear slate, I may be behind on afew lessons, particularly traded some social stuff for more technical stuff.
 
OP
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
I wear ear defenders or proper rally headsets when driving the rally car any real distance.
I usually slap on a set of Bose QC3's although the turbo honestly isn't that loud to be honest.

It's more out of habit from driving the SuperS with ITBs which was pretty harsh and that wasn't due to the exhaust but the induction noise transmitted through the firewall.
think I'll have to start putting hearing health & safety stickers all over the insides for passengers :p
fingers-in_-ears_.jpg
 
Trust me everything will fall into place,
the best thing I did was to take a boring mundane retail job whilst looking for a career path.
It got me out of the house and into a routine, also the constant customer contact helped with my lack of confidence. Yes I still struggle with large groups socially and like you I tend to talk in technical terms wich most people find weird but I'm much better than I used to be. Also the job provided me with some spare money to spend on the various projects I have which kept my motivation up.

I left uni with a degree in computer science but I had already decided that programming/IT was not an environment I wanted to work in as I need to be using my hands to build/fix things. I've ended up in the water industry working in pressure management and data acquisition. a job I love and one I never thought I'd be doing as I had no experience or real interest in the water industry but a company saw my CV and took intrest but my practical ability got me the job.
Basically my point is in a few years you might find yourself doing a completely unrelated job to what you want now. so cast your net as wide as possible and apply for any job that takes your interest even if you don't match the minimum requirements as something in your CV/application might get you an interview, you won't have all of the skills needed at the start of any new job but let them know you are willing to learn.

As for the love life don't force it, the more you look the more frustrated you will get. Just go out with mates etc and enjoy yourself and meet some girls but get to know them as friends and see where it leads, most of the time it will go nowhere but eventually someone will come along.

A few years ago I was in a pretty bad place. It was during a drunken conversation with a mate. When he said "don't worry about things you can't control" and he was right. since then I try to live by that rule, if there's nothing I can do in a particular situation then I don't worry about it, what will be will be etc


Personally I wouldn't be rushing to move out as the extra stress of paying bills etc etc might not be a good thing.
It might be worth talking with your parents and asking if you can take over the day to day running of the house, look for better energy deals etc pay the bills budget the weekly shop etc etc.
It's a bit if experience that will help when you are ready to move out, I wish I had some experience before hand, I found myself buying a house and being completely lost at the start and still am a bit a year later.

Obviously this is my journey and what worked for me might not work for you but at some point things will turn around for you. To coin a phrase from "What About Bob?" ( great film) take baby steps. One step at a time.

I hope my rambling on helps even if it's just to let you know other people are or have been in the same boat.
 
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OP
OP
pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Trust me everything will fall into place,
the best thing I did was to take a boring mundane retail job whilst looking for a career path.
It got me out of the house and into a routine, also the constant customer contact helped with my lack of confidence. Yes I still struggle with large groups socially and like you I tend to talk in technical terms wich most people find weird but I'm much better than I used to be. Also the job provided me with some spare money to spend on the various projects I have which kept my motivation up.

I left uni with a degree in computer science but I had already decided that programming/IT was not an environment I wanted to work in as I need to be using my hands to build/fix things. I've ended up in the water industry working in pressure management and data acquisition. a job I love and one I never thought I'd be doing as I had no experience or real interest in the water industry but a company saw my CV and took intrest but my practical ability got me the job.
Basically my point is in a few years you might find yourself doing a completely unrelated job to what you want now. so cast your net as wide as possible and apply for any job that takes your interest even if you don't match the minimum requirements as something in your CV/application might get you an interview, you won't have all of the skills needed at the start of any new job but let them know you are willing to learn.

As for the love life don't force it, the more you look the more frustrated you will get. Just go out with mates etc and enjoy yourself and meet some girls but get to know them as friends and see where it leads, most of the time it will go nowhere but eventually someone will come along.

A few years ago I was in a pretty bad place. It was during a drunken conversation with a mate. When he said "don't worry about things you can't control" and he was right. since then I try to live by that rule, if there's nothing I can do in a particular situation then I don't worry about it, what will be will be etc


Personally I wouldn't be rushing to move out as the extra stress of paying bills etc etc might not be a good thing.
It might be worth talking with your parents and asking if you can take over the day to day running of the house, look for better energy deals etc pay the bills budget the weekly shop etc etc.
It's a bit if experience that will help when you are ready to move out, I wish I had some experience before hand, I found myself buying a house and being completely lost at the start and still am a bit a year later.

Obviously this is my journey and what worked for me might not work for you but at some point things will turn around for you. To coin a phrase from "What About Bob?" ( great film) take baby steps. One thing at a time.

I hope my rambling on helps even if it's just to let you know other people are or have been in the same boat.
fantastic advice there ;)

I'm been helping out with me parents takeaway shop for the past few months, gives me summing to do and some pocket change.

my career been pretty much all over the place but it was my 2nd job as a innovation designer after my Masters deg where I was really having fun & happy thinking of clever ideas for clients and making prototypes in workshop and rare occasions where they're actually produced and u saw ur work in B&Q.
it was bliss, fun, good pay supported by university, stable life, no gf, no worries, doing what I luved & was meant for.
I really wanna get back into that world plus my extra luv for cars, hence recorrection of my career path. but aware that the 9yr detour from 3D digital tech could also be an added advantage for me cos 3D tech is blooming and is beneficial to all industries, I gonna use this to my advantage & mindset.

looking back at how vast I veered off from product designer to 3D modeller to senior 3D developer and yet I managed to adapt my skills, we can all do anything given enough time & dedication to learn, driven by passion of our interests.

yea I notice the more I force, or act wierd trying hard or admit stuff, the more they repell. logic suggests ignore peer pressure, ignore any desperate urges, forget about women ffs, just do what I do best and ppl will follow or notice. basically get back to when I was a young designer, purely work with no worries.

I mentioned before where I've been spoilt by living with parents for yrs where house running, bills, food, etc are sorted so I become lazy, especially 1 yr with no job.
but now that my moms away on holiday for 2weeks and I automatically know I have to do the washing after eating, cook when I'm hungry, fix DIY around house, being more responsible and gets me into routine, it feels good :)

my instinct just says I wanna get a job elsewhere & move out cos I feel I won't progress in life stuck here, lack of good interesting jobs around this dying town, want a fresh start elsewhere, would be awquid having relations with women if living with parents, wanna progress my life skills, wanna learn to be independant without constant nagging of parents.

two big Qs I'm missing thats always held me back from moving out for new job.
what's the name of job that suits my needs, ambition in life & qualification? (mix of inventor, mech eng, car designer/builder, R&D testing).
where & how to buy/rent a house, morgages & loans? how they work & what to prepare for?
in same way that I always prepare for things/events before I'm confident in commiting to it, I'm only confident in moving out & finding jobs if I can reduce uncertainties and have a plan/how-to.

and this councilling at the local Minds centre next week and mental diagnosis could be a step in right direction to hopefully arm myself with knowledge advice on filling those gaps of uncertain anxiety before I carry on this life roadtrip.
 
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
It's only now that I just realised that to stiffen up my rear saggy engine mount, rather than roughly cutting up some blocks or filling with bodyfiller that'll fall out, I could just 3D print a solid custom fitting wedge to slot securely into the gap without it falling out or breaking loose, doh. Will be the next task I look forward to.
 
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
I found the tigerseal polyurethane stuff too soft to have any effect and only cured down to afew mm.
just removed the mount and modelling it now..
 
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Time to stiffen the rear engine mount, removed the middle assembly

DSC01628.JPG


here's the old attempt with bodyfiller & bits of rubber belt which didn't work to well

DSC01629.JPG


cleaned up the mount

DSC01630.JPG
DSC01631.JPG


modelled the 2-half plastic bungs

mount 1b.jpg
mount 1a.jpg


printed & smoothed

IMAG3291.jpg
DSC01632.JPG


and inserted into the mount

IMAG3292.jpg


this should reduce the large movements and the hole clearance gap near the metal bushing should still allow tiny vibration movement without it rubbing/buzzing

DSC01634.JPG
DSC01633.JPG
 
I really like this Paul, a very creative solution, though I do like I_jonez suggestion of polyurethane too and not having access to a printer this would be the route I would choose. I used to work with polyurethane and made a few bits for my bikes ( chain rollers and such ) so easy to work with, if I was still there now I would be pumpin out uprated engine mounts and suspension bushes like no tomorrow haha.
Just as an aside, referring to your posts regarding your personal life, I think it is very brave of you to bare your soul like this on here, and please don't think that you are "strange/ill/something wrong" or whatever. We are all unique and different, there is no "standard" to live up to ( though various media might make you think otherwise ) we are who we are, and we shouldn't be made to feel like we need to change or fit in.
You mentioned your friends saying socially you converse too analytically, mechanically ect. This is who you are Paul, it is something you are very passionate about, maybe instead of trying to change you, you need to change your friends ( though I am sure they think they are just trying to help, which is nice ) I had to re-locate to the other side of the world to find what I was looking for ( at 32yold ) I am 50 now and I couldn't be happier.
As someone once said to me, "embrace the fear", not an easy thing to do I admit, but you know that saying "what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger" ? ..........it's TRUE.
And just finally, one piece of hope I can give you from my personal experience, as we get older things calm down, priorities change, life simplifies, at the end of the day the ONLY important thing is that you, and the people you care about, are healthy and happy. All the money,possessions,status in the world don't mean ####, we all go out the same way. Live for today for tomorrow is promised to no man ( I work in a hospital now, and see this all the time )
I hope this helps Paul, ( though I feel my post has ended on a kind of downer ) but life, and YOUR time here is all that really matters, enjoy it
 
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
I really like this Paul, a very creative solution, though I do like I_jonez suggestion of polyurethane too and not having access to a printer this would be the route I would choose. I used to work with polyurethane and made a few bits for my bikes ( chain rollers and such ) so easy to work with, if I was still there now I would be pumpin out uprated engine mounts and suspension bushes like no tomorrow haha.
Just as an aside, referring to your posts regarding your personal life, I think it is very brave of you to bare your soul like this on here, and please don't think that you are "strange/ill/something wrong" or whatever. We are all unique and different, there is no "standard" to live up to ( though various media might make you think otherwise ) we are who we are, and we shouldn't be made to feel like we need to change or fit in.
You mentioned your friends saying socially you converse too analytically, mechanically ect. This is who you are Paul, it is something you are very passionate about, maybe instead of trying to change you, you need to change your friends ( though I am sure they think they are just trying to help, which is nice ) I had to re-locate to the other side of the world to find what I was looking for ( at 32yold ) I am 50 now and I couldn't be happier.
As someone once said to me, "embrace the fear", not an easy thing to do I admit, but you know that saying "what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger" ? ..........it's TRUE.
And just finally, one piece of hope I can give you from my personal experience, as we get older things calm down, priorities change, life simplifies, at the end of the day the ONLY important thing is that you, and the people you care about, are healthy and happy. All the money,possessions,status in the world don't mean ####, we all go out the same way. Live for today for tomorrow is promised to no man ( I work in a hospital now, and see this all the time )
I hope this helps Paul, ( though I feel my post has ended on a kind of downer ) but life, and YOUR time here is all that really matters, enjoy it
thanks for ur awesome wise words yorkiesteve, so grateful for everyones loving support here ;)
aye it's quite a leap for me to post personal stuff here but I think it's cos I invested so much time & effort into this blog with a supportive friendly community and being convenient, it's become my only safe channel of output.
it's turned from a project car blog into a blog/personal life diary but not as public shouting to close friends/family as say FB, even though anyone can visit this forum.

I've always been this silly odd little sausage since childhood :p
imho being this silly strange daft behaviour back during school was I suppose a sort of defense mechanism to help freak away the threat of bullies since I obviously stand out.

but with school/college out the way, this behaviour is both a creative advantage but also a curse in trying to fit in. I saw everyone around me progressing in life with companions, homes, work, kids, fun holiday etc as the media suggested as normal and I desired that fantasy dream, yet here I am currently stuck ground bottom at 34 with none of that. therefore makes sense for me to question myself on what did I do wrong, or am I somehow psychologically broken (autistic, anxiety disorder, depression?) or not destined for any of that?
and this builds anxiety, especially with peer pressure & social expectations of getting job & gf/married/kids by 40/50 before our prime time & energy runs out.

it's an old fasioned outlook from the older generations pov tbh and the brain plays a tug war battle between:
A - panicing to fulfil this normal dream (to satisfy the biological urges & family/friends expectation) before it's too late or
B - accept my fate that it's just a mental conditioning pipe dream I'm not meant for and fook all this human pro-creation crap, and just do what "I" desire/dream (become a design engineer/inventor to develop & realise my many ideas to make a better faster innovative race car or think of innovative ideas to help save the world for humanity).

yea this analytical serious/professional technical language of mine is just a part of how I dedicated & cocooned most my life within this scientific, professional, technological world, meeting business ppl etc with almost zero social life. therefore the "normal" social gatherings & local casual subtle slang talk seems quite alien-world to me and requires huge mental effort/stress to adapt into.

I do sometimes question who my real supportive friends are. I've known my close local m8s since school/college, we have afew things in common over all these yrs and they're responsible for getting me out the house every weekend to the pub for normal drink/talk (otherwise I'd stay at home forever) but their way of dealing with situations is via joking, banter, talking the micky, critising my passions (being fan of mariah & my crazy micra), saying "ahh I'm only joking with ya". I suppose this is the norm of how lads bond but I don't function like that, I'm mostly serious, wanna help, with hint of sillyness. I don't often get sarcasm and at times the jokes/critisism may feel personal/offensive but I deal with it by letting it slide, ignore or admit defeat or laugh it off to defuse/move it on.

wouldn't have considered moving to another country, that's way outside my comfort zone but it's now that I'm trying to combat my anxiety fears first before such extreme measures. baby steps.

yeah true that what doesnt kill u makes u stronger/wiser. surviving from almost completely being taken advantage of by my last job and surviving depression from being dumped/rejected by several girls last yr has made me more aware that no matter how much we try to care for ppl, ppl outside actually really dont care about us and should just care/fend for ourselves instead.

I understand that our human life on earth is only brief and have limited time to contribute our efforts towards sustaining the human race / our family generations or improving our world environment to help sustain future life.
indeed money & materials don't really bring happiness & fulfilment in our short lives (they're just made up entities as a catalyst to induce change, "stirring the milky coffee" to make life interesting/adventurous). we are born to be loved, socially connect with other minds, to dream, experience & share our passions, to have purpose (pass on our legend like a relay race).

this has all turned into abit of philosophy talk ey? :p
 
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
installed the rear mount and ready to test

DSC01635.JPG


started engine and the level of vibration in the cabin & steering is the same.
drove around the place and conclude it's hugely better now after eliminating all the excess large gap movements in the mount :)

general high freq small vibration level is the same as before but the on/off power delivery is much smoother/tighter/responsive,
gear stick no longer jumps during sudden on/off throttle,
low speed on/off throttle transition during congestion intown is much smoother,
gear shift simply feels sharper, precise, faster, consistant. I can select 1st/2nd without it being notchy or wait for synchros to match.
 
Are you gonna sell those inserts? Or could you give the 3d model away? Totally understand if you dont give it away and i would actually recommend against it haha
 
I'd love a set Paul... If they're not too expensive to make, happily pay for some as they'll be cheaper than a full set of new ones!
 
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Are you gonna sell those inserts? Or could you give the 3d model away? Totally understand if you dont give it away and i would actually recommend against it haha
if you have the exact same upgraded rear mount as mine from matt humphris, I can print another one off for you. costs £20 plus postage to make.
if you have a different mount to mine, you'd need to post ur mount over so that I could measure & match the insert shape.
 
I'd very much be interested in a set! Possible to prepurchase? I'd even pay 30£+shipping, my rear mount is driving me mad...
 
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
I'd very much be interested in a set! Possible to prepurchase? I'd even pay 30£+shipping, my rear mount is driving me mad...
I'd be glad to make a set, just need to somehow obtain a standard 1.0 or 1.3 rear mount to model (maybe the LH & RH mounts too. The front mount I remember can't do much without wrecking the rubber bush) so that the inserts will fit in most ppls micras.
 
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pollyp

pollyp

Club Member
Front mount is only a pitch limiter anyway does nothing in the control of pitch as standard :)
front mount would have more benefit if it was a solid mount like the one I have from matt humphris, or if there was a way of putting the metal bush into a solid printed insert preferably without damaging the original bush, but yea the standard one has so much slack between the rubber & casing that it's only useful during extreme engine pitch angles (such as sudden launches or lift-off).

the rear & side mounts do most of the support & engine pitch control so wedging these inserts in the rear mount has more effect.
 
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