Renault jokes

[ollyc98]

Found this on another forum but some cheeky b-word had wrote micra instead....

Q: How do you upgrade a Renault?
A: Put in an engine.


Q: Why do Renaults have heated rear windows?
A: To keep your hands warm when you're pushing them.


Q. What's the difference between a Renault and a gay bar?
A. It's less embarrassing if your friends see you leaving the gay bar.


Q: What goes on pages 4-5 of the Renault user's manual?
A: The train & bus schedule


A man goes to a parts garage:
Man: "Can I have a windscreen wiper for a Renault please?"
Parts man: "Yeah, that seems like a fair swap."


Q: What do you call a Renault at the top of a hill?
A: A miracle.


Q: What do you call two Renaults at the top of a hill?
A: A mirage.


Q: What do you call a Renault with dual exhausts?
A: A wheelbarrow


Q: How do you double the value of a Renault?
A: Put in half a tank of petrol!


Q: What to you call a Renault with brakes?
A: Customized.


Q: What do you call a Renault with a seat belt?
A: A rucksack.


Q: How do you make a Renault go faster uphill?
A: Throw out the passenger.


Q: How do you make a Renault go faster downhill?
A: Turn off the engine.


Q: What do you call a Renault with a flat tire?
A: A write off.

 

[1.3GX]

Caravan Towing A Renault

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QsPnwi0nb2Q :laugh::laugh::laugh:

 

[Shaun]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QsPnwi0nb2Q :laugh::laugh::laugh:

AWESOME! lol

 

[Shaun]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5FWFBu4K_k&NR=1

and thats why you dont turbo mini renaults

 

[joesouthgate]

Think most of them are originally Skoda jokes lol

 

[Tom 1.0]

nowt wrong with skodas lol

heard most of thsoe before, like the rear windscreen one though

 

[Robb]

lol you really dont like renault do you olly fair play (Y)

btw where did it say micra!?!?! cheeky sods know nothing.

 

[danny1.0l]

absolutely love it they are the mutts nuts i tell you ill be sure to tell my mums boyfriend as he works for them

 

[ollyc98]

Yeah I hate Renaults I don't know why I ever bought one

This came off a bike forum, they know I had a micra and are always takin the p1ss

 

[Robb]

They have made some brilliant cars but are largely just terrible, me old man bought another scenic utilising the phrase 'stick to what you know' lol, as if its a good thing knowing what will go wrong with it in about a years time!?

 

[ollyc98]

Yeah, all clios have the same faults. Mainly being a really stiff clutch pedal cos the cable goes round 4 90deg corners, a leaky sunroof and a dodgy keyless entry.

 

[Seb_]

If one day you lock your Clio 1 doors leaving the keys inside, put your knees under the glass of the drivers door, pull the top of the ####y 2mm aluminium door toward you, et voilà, it is open.
Thanks renault !